A latenight text to my girlfriend.,
“You know what… I got d reason for my depressive love attacks…
Its my period weak,
As my dates approaches, all these thoughts about my past, which I never wanna remember as I want to… always comes with a flashback… I offen think what it would be if there goes a month without thinking about him… he is gone n I very well know that…
But why this happens…
I wanna make my heart totally empty to make space for others a chance to get in… but as of now.. I don’t know what to do.
There still arises a question in my heart, do I still love him or can I still love only him in future… but I know I can give a chance right…
I know am strong and all those stuff…
Like I have moved on… and all those bullshits words…
Bt am I really,
It’s like I curse him bt instantly, pray that d curse should not come true,
I howl on him at certain days for what he did, but I forgived him long time ago…
I know things are like, he is the chapter of my life which is shut close, but there is still a hope and carve to get him back some day… I know I should not say this… but right now just feeling all this.. so just speaking up..
His status say, ” Go behind what you want in your life to get it..” or something similar to it… I don’t remember.
Hey, don’t think I am following him, just a side glance on the whatsapp status on my roommates cell. Ya she still has his number.
Oky so what does it reallly means???
What he wants in life??? What he wanted??? Wasn’t I the only thing he wished to have in his life in past?? It might be something else now I know…
My head say me “stop…!! Stop thinking about him right now…” but my heart still beats fast as soon as I think of him… he has that power you know…
Okay fine I know m boring you…
But thats what friends are for….
So now as I am done with telling all that was in my head, I have a smile back on my face with the thought what will b ur reation reading such a huge msg.
Don’t panic, it was just a hormonal panic attacks of love, emotions…. so not only him, bit these days I feel attached with everyone around more dan before…. I think about you, manali of course, my family n friends in here…. but this one thing is so occupied that you know what now m used to this…
Just needed you to listen… so my heart could feel ease… that,
“Ya.., baby. There is someone who knows the truth behind your stronger approach towards life… !”
That someone is you…
Gud nyt sd tc…”
Send to my girlfriend….@ 2:23 am.
So what is this attack????
Love panic attack is the name I have termed it.
It is just like any panic or psychological attacks.
But these are due to the hormonal secretions which increases during the pre days of period, ie., menses., which a women since adulthood till menopausal phase under go thorough.
Just these thoughts get actually realted with all these hormonal increments, leading to lose of control over the conscious spectrum of emotions in brain, which in relation leads to more carving for love, attention, caring from loved ones and all those cosy stuffs attacts you.
So, there is nothing to worry if you feel nostalgic and irritating when these lost love thoughts trigger your mind and heart these days… just talk to someone close in your life, this some one in my case is my friend n yours can be your husband, friends, family, any relatives or colleague with whom you feel comfortable.
Once you let out your thoughts from mind, as you speak…..
You will feel relaxed… and cooldown eventually….
For atleast next 2-3 months and the torelance period will increase gradually, one moment where you’ll be adapted to deal with it.
This is based as per personal experience, just a thought that could be proved helpful….