A letter not yet sent…

My love,
This is strange that even after a long cruel breakup with you, I end up missing you each night more than I miss you during the day. It’s strange that I want you to read all what am writing but I know your gone far than my reach.
Dear, do you know life is become still without you?? You used to always complain about the amount of talks I had to tel you but you know everything is turn mute in me. You always used to say, I ignore your feels even when I tried my best to understand each words without your utterance, now that understanding is mis-tracked. I don’t understand even my own self.
I miss you, do you also miss me the same way I do???? It’s hard for me to stay quite for longer time without talking to you and now that I didn’t had any options I ended up typing this. Hope you get this some day and be forced to come back to me.
Today, while going through the pics in my lap, I found some of our pics. I had thought that I have deleted all our pics and nothing was left with me to cry on looking at it when I miss you but I found them. “The pics in which we weren’t present but where present when the pics were taken.” The shadows of our healthy love life refected in it than I questioned how than we ended breaking up after 13 yrs of friendship along with 6 yrs of commitment and being in relationship.???
I had no answer to this because till today my heart believes that you love me too and will be back soon with lots of love to compensate to all these days being apart.
You have your reasons to answer me but my heart denies to accept any of them.
I am living alone, and alone means alone.
And I have to say it’s really difficult. I am living as you desired my life to be unknowingly as an when you left and before for which I argued. That means, my life, mood and behaviour reflected to be what it was only because you were there to take care and handle and now when you left me, everything is just turned still…
Days are moving but am still standing at your door, waiting for your arms to hold mine and stop me to go away and ask me to stay forever…. I don’t know how to move on.. when moving on means to me living each day breathing only air but not exactly living…
At the end, am waiting looking from the hostel window, fetching you in streets, hoping to find you one fine day standing and calling out my name, and il be living that day again… am waiting no matter what happens in life.
And last and forver…. I Love You….
                From only your’s forever….


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